Creating New Traditions (and failing)
Going against the mainstream culture of Christmas and trying to find meaningful traditions for our family.
I’m not a fan of Christmas.
I grew up in the UK in a Christian family, so Christmas was a fairly big deal during my childhood. There was the religious aspect, that was important to my parents, but there was also the part that involved getting together with family, playing board games, staying up late to watch movies and eating lots of tasty food. I loved being cosy at home by the fire during winter, the smell of a pine tree being brought into your house and I loved putting up decorations. I have many happy childhood memories from this time of the year. And I also have memories of disappointment when the hype didn’t quite meet expectations and I remember a feeling of flatness after the festivities had ended.
As an adult, I have never really found my place with Christmas.
In my teen years, I actively chose to move away from religion; it just didn’t resonate with me and wasn’t how I wanted to live my life. This was the beginning of questioning; Why am I celebrating this religious festival in this way?
In my late 20’s, I moved from Europe to Australia and have been living here ever since (with a 2 year stint in Hong Kong when my son was a toddler). This move to the southern hemisphere was another nail in the coffin of Christmas for me. It removed the cosy ‘sitting by the fire’ seasonal celebration aspect of Christmas that makes sense in the northern hemisphere. It’s the middle of the summer here, why do many Australians have decorations of Santa, snowmen or snowflakes on their houses??? These trappings of Christmas may make some sort of sense in Europe, but to me here in Australia, they feel meaningless to me and shine the light on the fact that it’s all made up.
So what am I left with? We are secular so the religious part of Christmas is a no go. We don’t live near family so big family gatherings are out. The northern hemisphere winter celebration aspect of Christmas with the trappings of pine trees and decorations don’t make sense here in Australia. So the only thing I’m left with is a capitalist festival of excessive consumerism.
That part receives a big NO THANK YOU from me.
So, getting to the point of my anti-Christmas rant, this lead me to question why and how we celebrate not just Christmas, but other Christian holidays. (Don’t get me started on Easter and the Easter bunny!)
The problem with all this questioning is that it can leave your feeling empty. You take away the things that don’t make sense to you but that leaves you with nothing. Having points through the year that are meaningful and celebratory feels joyful to me.
This lead our family to embark on the idea of creating our own traditions around these holidays that feel meaningful to us. Last year I proposed the idea that, at the end of each year we create a family artwork representing something that has been important to us throughout the year. It all started well and at the end of 2023 we created a really fun collaborative artwork.
This year the whole idea has fallen flat. We (mostly me) came up with the idea of painting all the different species of birds that we see in our garden. There are lots and, coming from the UK, the birds here is Australia are pretty spectacular. I gives us all lots of joy watching them around our house.
It started well, I sketched the birds, began painting and my daughter joined in. I asked my husband and son if they would like to contribute to the painting and they declined. I left it a few weeks while we were away camping and tried again. Still no. The painting now sits half finished leaning against the kitchen cupboard.
It was supposed to be something joyful and it has totally fallen flat. I can’t force it to be meaningful to everyone in the family but I have to admit I’m feeling very disappointed. I could guilt them into contributing but then, I might have a finished painting, but every year I look back on it I’ll remember how I had to coerce the family into painting. That would completely kill the idea of it being a joy filled and meaningful family tradition. I have no choice but to move on.
With the pervasive nature of holidays like Christmas in white western culture, it’s really hard to go against the grain. It’s hard to do something different. It’s hard to find a tradition that feels meaningful to everyone in our family.
I’m still left feeling lost around Christmas. Maybe it’s best to just ignore it completely and go the the beach!
Do you have any family traditions that you cherish? Please share to give me a little inspiration!
WHATS NEXT FOR CREATIVE SPACES?
Over the last 9 months of writing and sharing ideas on Creative Spaces, I have formed a more cohesive idea of what I’m doing here. So, moving forward there will be a few small changes. I will be shifting my focus from sharing craft ideas (although there will still be lots of that), to writing about how we can use creative practices to build robust, grass roots communities. I will be sharing interviews with creatives, community organisers and agitators on how they are using creativity to support their local community. I hope you all stick around.
THE DETAILS...
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